An Incomplete Alien Survival Guide: pt. 2

How to survive an Alien Encounter.

Now that you know who I am, let’s talk about what to do when a world shaking encounter leaves your world rocked forever.

What do you do when you see something strange in the night sky? How do you account for that triangular shape hovering over the forest nearby? Is that strange glow at midnight a reflection of city lights off the nearby town, or an alien mothership coming to ground?

What do you do when the drone you’ve been scoping out ‘isn’t of terrestrial origin?” How do you deal with an encounter from something which has escaped from Skinwalker Ranch? How do you dodge sky-beams from the mothership, or escape the unexpected probe of curious interstellar visitors? How do you tell the difference between a dimensional duplicate and a parallel doppelganger? If these visitors come from our future, are they here to help, or mooch of of a world unspoiled by future disaster? Are we supposed to side with the Grays, the Greens, or the in-betweens? How much will it break the bank if you let ET call home, and should you ask him to use video conferencing apps instead?

Answers to all of these questions and more, will probably not be provided. (That’s why it’s an Incomplete Guide.) However, the advice offered through the rest of this guide should help you to survive a range of Alien-seeming, Alien-like, Alien-adjacent, and even Actual-Factual Alien Encounters.

My name is Nathan W. Landrum and I am an alien… enthusiast. And with recent government disclosures, an ongoing series of visual accounts, and an every-growing mountain of evidence, it’s about time someone offers a guide on how to deal with a potential extraterrestrial encounter. From worldwide disclosure to a singular event on a dark desert highway, I’ll help you figure out what to do if you’re expecting, experiencing, or imagining an alien encounter.

An Immediate reaction to an imminent encounter.

Every good guide should start with a list.

Lists are good. They are simple, and in the moment, an effective tools you can utilize to help you take step by step action to survive even the most Alien of encounters.

Really good guides will come up with a mnemonic device to help you remember them. So, let’s set the stage and get right into it.

What do you do if you encounter something which seems Alien in origin. You should

PANIC

PANIC

This stands for

Step #1 Panic. - Ahhhhh!!!!!! The world, life as you know it, everything you have ever learned, everything everyone has ever taught you, and every expectation you had for the rest of your life has, and will forever have, changed!!!!!

Change is scary, and change of this magnitude is an inescapable gravitational vortex. Panic is Justified.

Whether you are witnessing first contact on the lawn of (insert the residence or office name of the political figure you consider the most important here) or you are alone in your room when the oblong face of a Zebulon hovers up outside of your 4-story window and he then beckons to you, menacingly, using his telepathic ability, to coax you into joining him in his flying saucer for a little exploratory research, or perhaps you are in audience as Dr. Amelia Vasquez wheels a misshapen corpse into the theatre for dissection. Under any of these circumstances or more your life as you knew it is now defined by this moment.

Be they extraterrestrial, extra-dimensional, or extra-temporal, the introduction to the world of another actual factual intelligence separate from our own will at the very least validate expectations you already hold, and might possibly rock your belief system to the core. The experience itself might be equally traumatizing. Especially if the aliens are particularly gross, their message to humanity is particularly bleak, or your own personal experience is experimental in all the wrong ways.

And Trauma is defining. Trauma to the body shapes it for the rest of our lives. We may heal our nicks and cuts, our broken bones, and our laser scalpeled organs, but we bear the scars, the skeletal calluses, and the Andromedian-mesh for the rest of our lives. The same is true of mental trauma. And the first time you encounter aliens, will be with you for the rest of your lives. Whether the meeting is individual or disclosure is worldwide.

Large Scale Alien Appearance

We are so inculcated with Alien-speculation that it’s highly improbable that world-wide disclosure will actually result in mass-hysteria. People will Panic to be sure. (and if they’ve read this guide it will be the good 5 step kind.) They will send out their messages on social media. Some will deny. Some will accept. Many will simply get on with their lives and talk about it with friends, family, or co-workers. But life will move on.

Even if life moves on, everything will have changed. If the aliens are here for immediate conquest, it will have changed the most. Obviously. But even if they simply stop by to say hi, and make their presence known, we will be living in a post-disclosure world. That’s a world with new knowledge, new promise, and new concerns. I will delve more in to each of these in a later chapter, for now, my point is that even if Aliens Appear, and everything gets back to normal the next day, Things will have changed for everyone forever.

Small Scale Alien Encounter

If your encounter is a little more personal then the changes will be a little more individual. Be it abduction, visitation, or conversation with your minds through mental projection, the first time that you meet another being from another world you are forever changed. This is most obvious if you’ve been abducted to be placed in some Human Zoo amongst the stars or pulled down to hang out with the squares in a lower dimensional plane and cant find your way back, (because back and forward don’t exist in their limited dimensions.) But even if your abductor/new friend/visitor drops you off back where they found you, and even if they simply buzzed you with their UFO and didn’t even bother to make full contact, (a massive percentage of encounters are only partial encounters like this,) you are now left at a fork in the road that you probably hadn’t predicted ahead of time. You have choices to make, and no matter what you choose, you’re life is and always will be, forever different than it was going to be before.

We’ll get more into those choices later, but for now it’s enough to simply say that Alien Encounters of any kind, so long as they are verifiable, are blatantly examples of Life Changing or World Changing Trauma. And it’s ok to take a moment for yourself, allow you anxiety to take over (that raised blood pressure and heartrate might actually be beneficial if your alien encounter requires an immediate physical response) and simply let yourself Panic.

After all, it’s kind of lame to be stoic in the face of something so cool.

But, once you’ve taken some time to scream into your hat, the face of that Zebulon, or out loud at the top of your lungs, hopefully you’ll be able to remember that Panic isn’t simply an emotional state. It’s a prescription, and then you’ll remember that it’s the first word in the mnemonic Panic is to Panic.

This is usually where the media, and all of the comments on my social media feeds, stop but this is when it’s time to move on to:

Step #2 Are you sure it’s an alien?

You’ve had a moment to yourself. You might have freaked out a little. Maybe you punched someone you shouldn’t have. Maybe you woke several people in your household with your otherworldy-encountering scream! They, unaware of this guide, might now be in a panic without the steps. Maybe you were the cameraman filming first contact on the lawn of (insert the residence or office name of the political figure you consider the most important here.) And your Jitters caused the first moments of this historic meeting to have been captured in shaky-cam.

If you are this last one, then this advice isn’t for you, move on to step #3.

For everyone else, it’s now time to check and make sure you have the most obvious of facts correct. Swallow that heart stuck in your throat. Squelch your screams. Apologize to the Zebulon outside for overreacting. Your heart is racing! You’ve witnessed something new, something unbelievable, or, at the least, unpredictable. Your blood is pumping, your pulse is pounding. You are in prime fight or flight mode. Don’t do either. (unless the UFO you are seeing is barreling in your direction at a the rate of a Saucer on a one way collision course with New Mexico.)

Instead, use your fear heightened senses to do the obvious. Check to make certain that what you are observing is actually evidence of Aliens.

The number one form of reported Alien Encounter is a UFO sighting.

Here’s the thing. U.F.O. stands for Unidentified Flying Object. Not Alien Propulsion Machine, or Arcturan Mothership. Not Xobulus’s Cloud Hopper. (none of those even start with the same letters.) It also doesn’t stand for UAP which is Greek for UFO but lamer. Anyway U.F.O. or U.A.P., the first word is Unidentified. That means that they haven’t been identified. U.F.O.s come in lots of flavors: Falling Stars, Extra Bright Stars, Stars that seem to change color, Extra-strange or bright clouds. Sightings of these unexplained objects flying through the sky date back to the time before we started writing down our explanations of things.

But our ancestors were well versed in the night sky in ways we are not. Back when great(x27)-granduncle Zugg was laying on the plains at night, keeping watch so his family wouldn’t be eaten by the pack of smilodon that they had seen sleeping the previous day, he had nothing better to do than watch the sky. The night sky was such a prominent area of study for our ancestors that entire religions were made out of it, buildings were fashioned to coincide with it, and we somehow worked out how to navigate only using it. But today, much of that knowledge is considered extraneous, obsolete, and esoteric. The Egyptians wouldn’t have been ensnared in the mystery of “a really bright object that only moves slowly across the horizon. Because they understood the stars. Yet we often make those mistakes.

I once witnessed a news reporter covering a story in Missouri, where a “Strange UFO” had been sighted hovering over a suburb, several late afternoons in a row. The offending object moved very slowly (seemingly only a few degrees over the hour that people tracked it. Some noticed that it was changing colors, flashing blue, green, and red. Other’s noticed that the flashing stopped as the object raised higher and the night grew darker. People were out on the street to observe the strange phenomenon. One man who had invested more $ into a Telescope than time into understanding the night sky, had his massive rig out to track and photograph the unidentified flying object. “It looks like a star.” Some of the younger interviewers noticed, “But it’s out before sunset.”

That object. Venus. The movement noted, the normal movement of a planet or star tracing it’s way across the sky. The color changes, atmospheric interference (I’m way too lazy to discuss the physics.) Granduncle Zugg never would have been fooled by a color changing Venus, because, while he might not understand how a hazy atmosphere interferes with light from our neighboring planet, he would have known that the bright thing at the edge of the horizon was rising in about the same position, at the same time, as it had the previous evening.

Now, there are even more flying things zipping around through the sky, and we—rational thinkers and well-informed though we may be— are simply not equipped with the knowledge, eyesight, and experience to identify every flying thing we witness.

Take this recent Drone hype. There was a time before drones, and a time when drones became the #1 cause of all non-alien U.F.O. reports. At the time of writing, as ‘strange drones’ occupy the skies of New Jersey, some are seeking to explain these drones by asserting Alien origin. This is backwards thinking. Never start with aliens and work backwards. (in fact this could be the N in PANIC it’s so important.) Always start with other options and only accept Aliens if all other options fail. I will cover True-U.F.O. identification in another chapter. For now, I know it’s dangerous to have a checklist within a checklist, but work your way through all available options before arriving at Alien. These include: meteorite, satallite, the moon, venus, bright stars in haze, the other planets, airplanes with running lights, smugglers planes with no running lights, helicopters, experimental military craft, dummys in jetpacks, dumb people in jetpacks, drones, flocks of birds, weird clouds, one of our spacecrafts, and many more. Eliminate all of these before accepting the possibility of UFO.

But what if you’re sighting is not one of the 99% false alien U.F.O. reports? If it’s another type of alien encounter entirely. Let’s say you are witnessing first contact between some world leader and an alien on T.V. or the internet, or hearing about it on the Radio. Well, first, make certain that you are watching/listening to a news channel, and then make certain you are actually watching/listening to a reputable news program. Don’t trust anything on first glance, especially from sketchy websites, and especially in an era of AI art generation. I will go into more detail about verifying broadcasts later, but I just want to remind you that more than one person has been utterly convinced of immediate news because of fake news broadcasts inside movies.

Are you sure it’s aliens? Could your friends have rigged an elaborate prank? Perhaps that Zebulon outside your window is a costume mask. Maybe that voice in your head claiming to be contacting you from a planet orbiting Betelgeuse, is really just the early warning signs of a possible psychological condition. Are various media outlets only covering a recent U.F.O. outbreak because it’s good for the ratings? Are they saying anything of substance besides “we don’t know but they could be scary?” Could it be a man in a suit hoping to trick the world, or a more localized man in a suit hoping scare you away so he can dig through your house for treasure? Could the wreckage you’ve discovered on your cattle farm belong to a balloon maybe?

Run your potential alien through the patented Alienjest Press Alien Certifier (in a later chapter) before you decide that your alien is an alien for sure.

And once you have, it’s now time to move on in more confidence and ask

Step #3 Now, are you really sure it’s aliens?

Apply critical thinking. It’s incredibly important, and will help to ease your, (earlier advised,) panic.

I know. It’s my fault that you’re panicking, and it’s good that you were panicking. But hopefully running your potential alien encounter through other possibilities has helped you to calm down. And now it’s time to ask the question “Are you sure it’s an Alien?” Again.

Unless you are running through this list while inhabiting the inside of a spacecraft jetting away from Earth and out to worlds unknown, or are currently locked in Humanities first actual interstellar war against a species that just announced itself and a desire for Earthly Conquest in the same sentence, (in which case it’s time to move on to step #4) then it’s time to take a step back and reassess.

You’ve run through the options and still think you have a UFO on your hands. It’s time to get all aeronautical on this UAP. What makes you want to tip the scales from Unidentified to Alien? Is it really moving in ways impossible for known flying objects. Is it 6 feet in front of you and absolutely a hovering saucer? Is the shape really that weird for what we know of manmade flying crafts. (note that, at a distance, boxy drones square bodies might be visible when their rotors are not.) Are you seeing a Californian Condor? This is an important time to run your U.F.O through the Obvious filter.

It’s unidentified, I get it, but think about how hard it is for something to traverse interstellar space, across dimensions, or through the multiverse. Does your observation of a slightly too-fast turn, or a slightly strange shape- really justify an applicable and immediate acceptance of faster than light, cross-dimensional, or temporal travel?

Remember that balloons, stealth fighters, helicopters, Icarus, planets, and now drones have all been mistaken as crafts with other-worldly origins. (I once thought a firefly came from Canis Major.) So before you are ready to declare to your superiors that the bogey on your six is from Planet X, or call reporters to report on the shiny object hovering over your neighborhood, ask yourself first, Am I confident enough in this decision to stake my reputation on it, travel to U.F.O conventions telling the story, and perhaps report to government officials about my sighting when they are looking to drum up attention to their otherwise mundane and corrupt existence.

Now, that was heavy on the U.F.O.s. That’s only because U.F.O.’s make up the bulk of reported Alien Phenomena. Which makes sense. If you live along an interstate pull off, cars are probably the most common form of human interaction you witness on a daily basis. But even with any other potential alien encounter, it’s important to remain skeptical even after you are convinced.

Acknowledgment that you alone, or you along with the rest of the world, are actually bearing witness to an Extraterrestrial Intelligence requires a big hurdle. There is a reason that it hasn’t happened for most of the 8 billion people on Earth, yet. There’s a reason why people seek to find other explanations, such as: reflections off swamp gas, Venus, a flock of Canadian Geese, military aircrafts and secrecy, and other such conclusion. There is a reason why jokes like the following are so popular

“What’s the most believable thing about the UFO Crash in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947?”

“The fact that it was a crash, because why else would a UFO land in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947?”

The reason is simple. What do we have to offer intelligences who are able to transverse the stars, dimensions, or timestreams? A breathable Atmosphere? How do we know they need anything in our atmosphere to breath? Some unique resource like gold or platinum? These are a dime a dozen in asteroids? A workforce? Have you seen humans? If they come for our workforce they are coming for the cows, horses, or elephants, and they could probably build better robots than we could anyway.

So why would they come here?

Curiosity? A desire to meet with another intelligent race? Pshaw. If there is another intelligent race out there, there are probably lots of intelligent races out there, and we are, let me assure you, not all that interesting. If there are only a few, then maybe we’d merit a visit, but that just means it’s less likely there would be any visitors.

The Great Filter, (remix) Any potential Alien event must pass through a great filter of if’s, how’s, why’s, and are there any other options? Before you should really sign off on the idea that what is happening is actually Alien, you must make sure that there aren’t any other plausible explanations. Ask the following questions: why would the creators of such a craft leave such an obvious weakness as visibility to the naked eye? Is it more likely that that was a picture of an actual alien or something else? Was that just generative AI? Is Globulon actually just a man in a suit? Is it possible that this current Alien craze is just a way to optimize those search engines with bloviated articles which say nothing?

If, after your experience, or the world frenzy, surpasses the highest possible level of scrutiny, only then is it time to accept that…

Step #4 It might actually be an Alien.

“Alas Poor Yorrick, There are more things in Heaven and Earth than are dreamt of by your philosophy professors.” — Julius Horatio Shakespeare.

Ok. Beyond any level of doubt, at the risk of world sanity, and your reputation, what you have in front of you might just, could possibly be, an Actual Alien.

I’m using Alien as a general and collective term to include Transdimensional Travelers, Parallel Universe Sliders, Temporal Shifters, and Traditional Interstellar Extraterrestrials. (We’ll go into how to identify which one you are dealing with later.)

An Actual Alien, (origin to be determine) stands in front of you, hovers over your head, has greeted you president/prime minister/dictator/queen, is on the dissection table in front of you. etcetera etcetera. Well. Heck. That’s pretty cool. If you’ve remembered to panic, then you’ve already panicked and it’s time for a cooler head to prevail. This is why I’ve written this entire guide… which definitely doesn’t stop here until I write the next part.

It’s time to accept that Aliens exist, and you have just witnessed them. Step 4 is really fast on paper, but might take some time in practice. Take as much time as you are able. Obviously, if the aliens are hostile you don’t have a lot of time. If, however, you were simply the witness to a drunken late-night Alien Flyby, you have as long as you need to process what you just saw, but I wouldn’t take too much time, because now is the perfect time to move on to

Step #5 Communicate!

Aliens are real, and you saw, are seeing, witnessed them on TV. You’ve panicked, you’ve tried to discount what you have/are seeing, you tried really hart to find any other explaination, but you have finally accepted that Aliens are real and you are witness.

The next and most important step is the first step for all of mankind.

Communicate.

Communication is key to any long term relationship, and it might just be key to your survival. How you communicate, what you communicate, who you communicate to, this guide will go over all of these in more depth at a later point. But PANIC is applicable upon first encounter, so we’ll approach this here from the context of an immediate Extraterrestrial Event.

however, we will have to break these in to seperate occurances.

U.F.O.s. If you see a UFO, how you communicate and who you communicate to is entirely dependent upon proximity and behavior of said UFO. If it is close to you, and doesn’t appear to be leaving, you can try to wave, flash your headlights, or whip out an instrument and play these 5 notes: G, A, F, and then drop an octave to play F, and C. If the UFO did a quick flyby and now is gone, then all you have is a good story to tell your friends later. If it is anything in between these two, then it is your responsibility to remember as much about the encounter as you can, get a photograph or video of the craft in question, and then share it far and wide. If the UFO is approaching you in a threatening manner, then the best form of communication is a loud scream and an attempt to escape.

If it’s an alien outside your window, or an alien of any type makes an appearance to you, then communication with them is key. If they happen to be familiar with the particular sections of the electromagnetic spectrum that we use for Television, Radio, and the Internet, then there is a chance that they know some Earth Languages. If you are lucky, they might know yours. Try it. Say Hi. If it doesn’t work, try English. Unfortunately, the furthest traveling signals are in English.

Now, if the alien is, let’s say, extra Alien. (A giant glob of mucus which glows with many colors, an insectile like creature who clicks and hisses, an amorphous haze, a geologist) then let them take the lead. The best way to communicate might be silent observation. Hopefully something will spark. Do not attempt smell, color changing, or physical contact communication until you are certain of the language. Remember that they are alien, a dank sulfurous smell might be alien for hello, or it might be gas after a long space-trip. An offered hand might be an attempt to mimic human handshakes, but if the aliens communicated by segmenting limbs, they might not give yours back. If you are standing in front of them and the haven’t immediately vaporized you, then there might still be a chance to communicate, but approach any attempts with patience and studied understanding.

If you are made aware of the Aliens by a worldwide broadcast, or the hijacking of all Earth signals, then the best form of communication is immediate compliance. Their technology is already proven to be far in advance of our own, and even if you plan to fight back later, it’s best to start in their good graces, so you have a chance to gain access to technology, learn their weaknesses, and fight back later. Besides, why are we talking about fighting back now? Listening is a form of communication, and this is the perfect time to listen. Maybe they just want to say hi, maybe they want to initiate interstellar trade. Maybe they just have dire warning about a preventable future.

Communication is key in relationships and life, and sometimes a loud scream will go along way to alert your household to the imminent threat posed by an unexpected otherworldly visitor with probes on the mind. (and may avert abduction) Communication is even Key even when you are dissecting an alien corpse, as you are dealing with an Alien. Are you sure it is really dead? It’s best to ask it directly, and apologize before each cut, just in case. Also, if you can prepare enough information, you might be able to turn a chance encounter on an empty roadway into a lifelong hobby, a decent book deal, and several convention appearances. But this is long term planning which we will delve into in more depth in later chapters.

Next time we’ll go into some actual survival tips, but for today, I just want to reiterate my best 5 step tips for an imminent encountering aliens.

If you see strange lights at night, if a visitor threatens to take you to another world, or you find yourself a lone mammal in a room where everyone is shedding their skin for the reptilian form the keep locked underneath, then the first thing you need to do is PANIC.

Panic, Ask if the aliens are real, Now ask yourself again if you are really really sure, If so, and it really is aliens then attempt to Communicate with them, or the people around you.

Now that you are prepared to survive most initial encounters, lets talk about what comes next.

Next time!